Wow, what a wonderful video!

Please, please watch this! it is sooo good!


http://www.revivalhymn.net/index.html

I love the KING JAMES BIBLE

This is a picture of the flout that our church made for the 2011 Christmas parade in Payson AZ celebrating the 400 year anniversary of the beloved KING JAMES BIBLE, it is about 8' high by 6.5' wide and it is very heavy, when the parade was over there was no place to store it so they decided to take it a part,I was crushed when I heard that so David and I went to our pastor and asked him if we can take it home and put it in our front yard? he agreed then a couple of weeks later a brother from church brought it down on his truck and set up with David in our front yard, we see many people slow down and look at it as they drive by in front of our house.

We found some Christmas lights today and we put them the same way it is in this picture, it is lit tonight.

This is one of the reasons I love America, it is still legal to have our Bibles and not be afraid of showing the world our love for the WORD OF GOD.

Institute in Basic Life Principles (Bill Gothard)

It has been about 3 months since we joined the Institute in Basic Life Principles on line, it only cost $99 for the whole year but it is worth every penny, we have watched so many seminar sessions, preaching sermons and teaching videos, we are learning so much about real Biblical Christianity and how to live it at home and out in the world, it amazing to me being saved for 15 years now and been in Bible believing churches but never heard this kind of teachings.
One of our favorite is the financial freedom seminar taught by Jim Sammons, it is EXCELLENT we learned so much about money, what God's word the Bible says about the purpose of money and the principles that we have to follow in managing finances, I liked it so much that I am having my daughter Iris do the seminar and the text book that comes with it as a homeschool course on finances.

Our End Of The Year ..Dec.2011

What a great end of the year THE LORD gave us!!!!!!!
I am so amazed at His goodness and mercy toward my family....
First of all for David and I God brought a revival to our relationship and it is so exciting to see the changes He is doing in our hearts towards each other, He is showing us more of our weaknesses and how they affect our relationship and our children and what is God's way to overcome them and go on to victory, He is teaching us new ways of communicating our desires and feelings with each other and the things that matter to us as individuals and with that he is giving us the gift of wisdom and understanding in dealing with the different situations we are facing and having to deal with.
All I know the Lord opened a wide door and pour out blessings of confession, forgiveness, healing, and love for His word the Bible and for each other so we stand and sing together (O Victory In Jesus) with an overwhelming joy that only comes from heaven above.
Oh how kind is our LORD..........how sweet is the fellowship with Him in the light of His Word, so my testimony for 2011 is that MY GOD IS FAITHFUL.
There were so many events going on at church and LORD enabled us to participate in,
my favorite one was the missionary meeting with Bro. Sutek, the message he preached was wonderful and he brought to us wonderful truths out of the book of Hebrews so I decided to read it at least once a week.
The other wonderful event was the fancy home made Appreciation Italian Dinner that our Italian Pastor and his wife make every year for the church members...oh my the food was so good the decorations, the fancy tables set up with the candles and the so many kinds of home made desserts that his wife made, I could not believe my eyes I think there were at least 10 kinds of cookies, pies, and cakes that she baked from scratch, and the Italian bread, salads and home made dressings, she made 2 different red spaghetti sauces, one with meat balls and one with sausage, chicken in white Alfredo sauce, she even made mozzarella cheese and after dinner they had fun games for the family together and some for the children, we had an amazing evening.
Then on New Years Eve we had a watch night service we got to hear some of the young preachers, sang beautiful hymns, prayed in the new year and of course there was games food and fellowship, well it was too late for us to drive down home so our pastor offered for us to stay the night at the Prophet's Chamber so we were able to be in church and worship our God on the first Sunday of 2012.

December Blessings

It has been a great beginning so far, the LORD helped me read the whole book of Revelation a couple of times and He helped me get 5 people saved so far but I am hoping for at least 5 more before the end of the year.
A few days ago David called from work to let me know that he was getting laid off on the fifteenth, my answer was "well praise the LORD", I have such peace about him loosing the job now unlike the times in the past, it is a real blessing!!! then a couple of days ago his manager told him that he can stay until the end of Jan/2012 and my thought was again"well praise the LORD". Another big blessing we had is going to the shooting range for a whole day and we got to shoot all kinds of different guns and learn about them. It was alot of fun! and Lord willing we will be doing that more often. Another big blessing was to see our horse DeeKay after months of medical care, hoof care, exercise and training that he started performing so good especially the past couple of days with the rain, he was getting frisky and running all over the backyard showing off his strength, speed and beauty. I can't wait to see Iris sitting on his back and taking off down the dirt road at a dead run. And the latest blessing in the past couple of days is the amount of rain and the beautiful winter weather we are having we even had snow on top of the Superstition Mountain behind our house! It is an amazing and breath-taking view from my kitchen window, when finally the clouds pass by uncovering the white covered peaks of the mountain which makes my dish-washing event a joyful one.

Well I must stop now and enjoy the rest of the blessings God is going to give me for the rest (2011).

NIV Bible Verses King James Bible

I just came across one of the most awful things I have ever seen in the NIV translation of the Scriptures and it really caused me to write this post.
In Isaiah 14:12 the NIV bible prophesy that it is not Lucifer who will in the end be cast into hell, but rather the "morning star"who is the LORD JESUS CHRIST. Here is the verse from the NIV
Isaiah 14:12
How you have fallen from heaven, morning star, son of the dawn! You have been cast down to the earth, you who once laid low the nations!
Here is the verse from the King James Bible
¹²How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! how art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!
The"morning star" is one of the titles of the Lord Jesus Christ in the book of Revelation 22:16.
If you use the NIV and you do not believe the above then get your bible out and start comparing it to the beautiful King James Bible and see that for yourself.

One More Soul Bound For Heaven

Yesterday David and I went to Wal-Mart as we were coming out we saw this young man standing in front dressed up with fancy Army uniform, he had some coupon books that he was trying to sell for funds raising, so we stop and asked him a couple of questions and then proceeded to share with him the plan of Salvation, when we asked him if he was sure he would go to heaven when he died he said that wondered and thought about that a lot and did not know, so we showed him how he can know for sure by believing that Jesus died to paid the penalty for his sin and asking Him for the gift of Eternal life, it took a little while explaining it then we asked to him and if he wanted to to believe in Jesus and ask him for the gift of Salvation, he said Yes, so when we said lets pray he extended his hands to us and we all bowed our heads and lead him to our LORD.
It was one of those days when the Lord burdens us for the lost and would have some seeking and all ready to get saved, this was the case with this young man, His name is Micheal and he had a very long German name, he is 16 years old and wants to go into the Army so he could finish his collage degree, I can tell that he was poor, he had glasses on that were broke and kept together with tape. he was very polite and professional, well that young man made our day, and we went home rejoicing.

My 1st Horse Back Ride In The Desert

Finally I did it.......my first horse back ride outside of our property and into the desert, Iris rode Pumpkin and I rode Virgil Kane the weather was beautiful, and the horses were excited, Virgil even trotted with me on his back, I managed SOMEHOW to stay on him.
We even stopped at a garage sale and shopped. Iris taught me a lot about horses and gave horse back riding lessons, she saddled the horse for me and got him ready for the ride, it is so nice have someone that is always ready to go for a ride anytime I feel like getting on my horse. This is another one of my dreams coming true.

Greens, greens and more greens.

The weather is getting nice around here, the heat is pretty much gone and we even are having chilly nights too, our garden is perking up and just exploding with all kinds of greens like basil, mint, garlic, green onions, radishes, chard, kale, beats, and the grapevines are looking green and pretty. So I started cutting them back and drying the leafs to use for seasoning and make my special salt mix, I avoided going outside the past few months but now it is so nice I can stay out all day long, those pictures are some of the greens I picked this morning for drying, after they dry I grind them and mix them in the salt that we use for cooking.
I add lots of this mix to the garlic powder and use it to make our delicious homemade garlic bread.
My mother showed me how to do this, she grows all kinds of herbs and vegetables organically almost all year round, but that is only in San Diego, CA. and now she has so much she started selling them to some Middle Eastern stores close where she lives.

One of the biggest blessings about greens is that my children love eating them raw anytime of the day with meals, in fact we all like them a lot.
God is so good to us to create so many different kinds of greens for us to enjoy and be healthy,
every time I look at so much greens in my hands my heart swells with gladness and over flows with thankfulness to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, and the verse from the bible (All thing were made by HIM) comes to my mind right away.

Our Wedding Anniversary

Sep. 21st /2011 marked our nine years anniversary... we still fit in our wedding clothes!!!! I had to shed 4lb to be able to get into my dress, but David fit fine in his suit, he looked just as handsome and so attractive to me as he was when I saw him in his suit on our wedding day.
The first anniversary we put on our wedding clothes and went out to dinner, we had a blast, the second anniversary David got really sick with the flu, 3rd anniversary I had Nellie on Sep. 14 /2005 so I could not wear my dress, after that we had to move so many times I did not even know what box our wedding clothes wear in, finally we are settled here and so I did find the clothes and decided to dress up and go out, we had so much fun.

God has been so good to us even though we do not deserve to have family, children, shelter, Salvation, and more importantly HIS WORD the KJB, church family and so much more, HE still chooses to bless us faithfully and keep us together, there is only one reason why we are even here.....it is HIS MERCY AND GRACE.
It is really important for us to celebrate our wedding anniversary in a big way, we want to show our girls that marriage is one of the most wonderful creations of God and it is really a good thing that we are married, we want to show them a live picture of the day we both made our commitment to each other before God to stay together and be faithful, besides we want them to have those memories in their minds too so they can look forward and wait for their God's choice for them and have a wedding day and make it a very special one.
Nellie had so much fun, she was so exited and was looking in
in such an amazement at both of us,
then she wanted to wear my wedding dress so we made the deal that the next day was her day to wear it so she did.
Here is the story of our first anniversary,
We spent our first anniversary at a cabin near the Arrowhead Lake close to San Bernardino CA area, a sweet couple Mr. Kieth & Harriet Gregory own it and offered it to us to spend our Anniversary, they were customers at My hair salon in La-Mesa CA for a long time, that little A shaped cabin was such a lovely and cosy place it had a big fire place, steps that went up stair to the bed rooms and a couple of steps that went down to the dinning room and the kitchen area, it had everything in it that we needed to have a special and quite time, we really loved that little place and made sweet memories there, I think the Gregory's name it "end of Journey" or something close to that, it was surrounded by big huge pine trees, when the evening came we went out to eat at an authentic Italian restaurant in our wedding clothes that they recommended for us to have dinner, the waitress and every one was looking at us thinking we just got married, and they treated us very special, we ordered a pizza and antipasto salad, they made them so big we were shocked when they brought them to our table, every one was congratulating us and just was very nice and friendly.
There was a big fancy resort and little shops close by so after dinner we drove there and went for a walk, as we were walking in the front of the entrance we saw some people coming out of the resort, when they saw us they stopped and started clapping and congratulating us, as this was going on a fancy black car stopped in the middle of the circular drive way and the driver pulled out a music instrument that looked like a horn and started playing some fancy song, in no time there was at least 25 people standing around us all looking at us with smiles enjoying the music, (David and I were in a total shock looking at each other and loving every minute of it) and when the song was over they congratulated us and walked away, David and I still think that God orchestrated all that, we had no Idea when we went out that we were going to have such a memory that can only be read in a Cinderella like stories.
The second anniversary was very different, my dear Friends Harriet and Kieth offered us the cabin again and we did go up there but David got very sick the same day we drove up and had a nasty fever the whole night, we did stay for a couple of days, it was still a blessing to be at that cozy cabin, Kieth and Harriet were in their early 80s back then, He past away a while ago, I did share the Gospel with them both about 11 years ago, she was a devote Presbyterian and went to the same church most of her life, her eyes would water like she wanted to cry every time I talk to her about Jesus when I did her hair, nails, they came to my old church Light House Baptist Church a few times when I invited them to the Christmas and Easter and other big events when we had them, they did come to our wedding too and were so happy for us, and after David and I got married and we closed the salon then they used to come to our house in El-Cajon, she did look for my phone # and found it a couple of years ago through some one that knocked on her door from my old church trying to give her an invitation to visit Light House Baptist Church in San Diego, Ca and so she asked them for my info and someone called me from there and gave me her phone # and told me to call her, so I did and when I went to San Diego Ca about a year ago she invited me to visit her at her home, she was as sweet as ever, we had a wonderful time visiting and sharing our memories together at the salon, we had tea and cookies then we went down to her next door neighbor which used to be one of my customers at the salon her name was Margy Saddler and visited with her and her husband too.
Mr. Kieth & Harriett Gregory first started coming to the salon when I had just got pregnant with Iris, and that was 1996, that was about 15 years ago...woooooooooooow.
I was so glad to know that she had some family members staying with her and helping her out.
It was this wonderful couple at the salon when David walked in for a hair cut the first day I met him, I will be posting the whole story here to show how they had a part in us being married today.

Our Pumpkin Patch

Some of the pictures below are from October 2010 we had so many pumpkins given to us, we carved and carved, we even gave many to our neighbors, we literally lined up half of our circular drive way and up the steps to our front door and we had a pile of them on our front porch. We saved a lot of the seeds, washed them, dried them and made doggy cookies using them. we had so much fun smashing some of the pumpkins for our goats, chickens, horses and our sweet pot belly pig T.T., so many of the seeds fell around in the yard so with a little of water they grow and grow.... now this is what we have pumpkins, pumpkins every where, so this fall if we want to get some pumpkins we just have to go to the pumpkin patch in our back yard pick and carve and may be even make some pumpkin pies for the Harvest Pot Providence at our church.

Church Camping Trip

It has been a tradition at the church to do this camp for many years, It was our first time to participate since we just joined this church January of this year.

There was so much singing, wonderful preaching, playing, and eating, it was so much fun and relaxing.
Iris enjoyed playing all kind of games, Bible quizzes, sword drills, volleyball, baseball, football and so many other silly gamesNellie was so occupied but in a very different way though, she just wanted to go and explore, collecting acorns and PICKING WILD FLOWERS was her favorite thing to do, she just loved walking with her friends and just being there!! she was so overwhelmed with all what she was seeing of God's beautiful nature that she forgot she was hungry until it was time to go to bed then she would ask for peanut butter and honey sandwich.
It happened that her birthday fell in the camping week, so she had a grand time celebrating it under the big gathering tent in the middle of the camp with all her friends and the church there, they all were so kind and made her feel very special.

There was such a sweet spirit of fellowship, kindness and help with every one there.

Augest 2011 soooooooooo many blessings...

This past month was full of blessings, David's work has been great, Iris is doing real good at school, violin and piano and is improving so fast I can not believe it!!! she just started playing violin in the orchestra at our church, besides she had the chance to play on the grand piano one Sunday because our pianist was out of town, she did a great job, I love hearing her practice and have music playing noises all over the house, she is doing good at her school and just finish the whole grade Science so now she only have three subjects to study daily in fact she is one unit from finishing History too maybe in a couple of days, then she will have only two subjects, Nellie is growing up so fast, She is going to be 6 on the Sep,14 Th she is so busy and want to clean, dust, organize, decorate and redecorate, cook, bake, sew, she is very artistic and loves painting, she is always painting something, our house is already full of so many things that she painted.
Church has been wonderful, the preaching, singing and so much. We had a sing inspiration at our church, our family did a skit on door knocking, it was so much fun, so many families sang together it was a heavenly day.
Our animals are doing well in spite of the heat waves we are having.
I am still getting lots of goat milk and I make cheese and yogurt, and I think all my females got bred this past 2 month too so we are going to have the kids in 4-5 months, still get a few eggs from our chickens every day, we have been eating lots of fruits and berries in the morning and it really gives me so much energy, the pool especially have been so much fun and relaxing for all of us and I especially love exercising in it too.
we finally got all the horse panels we needed to make the round pen and stalls for our three horses, Iris's horse was not doing good he had a problem with his hoofs so we had to have the vet over and found out he was having laminates so we started his treatment and he is doing better, I cannot wait for the weather to cool off little bit so I can start riding lessons. It will sure be easier now that we have a round pen. Nellie likes to ride but are unable to stay out a lot because of the heat.
We just got 2 squeezes of Alfalfa and Bermuda grass for our horses and goats so we are set for the winter, we keep hearing the the prices of hay and grass are going to get worse than what they already are now.
We had the August teen /parent night at our house, they all went swimming and horse back riding then Bro. Darryl did the devotions for us, Iris and I cooked a big meal so we all had a great time of fellowship, fun and feast.
We did a bunch of sewing lately, I had gone to the Goodwill store on a 50% off Saturday and bought a bunch of material and made some matching skirts.
We used to have a dear Friend that Iris Met at Paws 4 Life she was about 20 years old, a very good seamstress she was coming to our house to help us sew and we had a great time with her but she just went to collage a few day ago, we are going to miss her dearly.
I started reading Debbie Pearl's book "Created To Be His Help Meet" FOR THE 3ED TIME NOW, I love this book!!!!!!!!! It seems like I need to be reminded over and over of my role in life, living independently for so long in my twenties causes me to often get into an ungodly and selfish attitude of "me, myself, and I "and the "O poor me" junk, even though I know it is wrong and from the pits of Hell I still do it, that is why I pick up that book and read it again and again. The first time I read it 5 years ago, David noticed the change in my heart and he really liked me that way, it made me happier, it really did!!! by God's grace I will try to be what God created me to be more and more as He gives me more grace and more days to live on this earth, I am so glad God is still working on me and does not give up, He is so merciful, kind and long suffering.
Thank you God for all your blessings.

July 2011

July was a busy month, it started with having my brother's family from Denmark and my mother from San Diego Ca visiting here, while they were here we went to the Gold Field ghost town and had a blast especially going down the gold mine, then we went to the Salt River for tubing, then went to Canyon lake for Fish Fry dinner, and one early morning they all went hiking the Silly Mountain, they loved our pool and were in it every day Sara did some horse back riding with IrisGod allowed us to lead my 2 nieces 18 & 15 years old to the LORD sitting around our dinning table it was a blessing....this was the highlight of the visit. We became very close during those few days(first time we met they were 5 & 3 years old) that was eleven years ago, Iris and the girls really got along and had so much fun and laughter. On the 19th we celebrated Iris's 15th birthday, and on the 27th we celebrated David's birthday.

David's grandma went home to be with our LORD on the 25th at the age of 97, she was a very godly, virtues and very respected woman, she had a list of all her children, grand children, great grandchildren and their spouses in her Bible and she got up every morning at 5 am to read her Bible and pray for all of us, we all miss her greatly.

Church has been wonderful ....the preaching of God's word got me fired up again and made me want to win souls, and it was 4 souls that I was able to lead to the LORD during the month of July, we ended the month with a beautiful Sunday at church then had a church wide ball game and then dinner at Del Taco, we had great fruitful month.

Sara Trying to milk our one horned goat "Sweet Penny"
The girls were crazy about anything western.
They loved holding some of our kittens
There first time eating "Pho" and first time ever drinking Root beer"

Iris and one of our baby goats.

New little additions ..baby chicks

It time of excitements around here again ...little chicks are hatching every day, Iris discovered the first one a few days ago... right now we have 5 chicks so far, the 2 mama hens have at least 20 eggs under each one so we are going to see how many God will bless us with this time.
Well, the past few days we worked on moving the 2 big, metal horse shades and the big tack shed to another location in our back yard so now we have a complete un-interrupted view of the Superstition Mountain in our back yard besides we are putting up a very large round pen so we can exercise the horses and practice riding them in a safe place.

Today was the first day we felt that summer is really here, we turned the air conditioner on, it felt good!

Our garden is full of blessing especially tomatoes of all sizes and kinds, Nellie is our fruit and veggie picker, she is always thrilled when I ask her to please go and pick some veggies. But, her favorite thing lately is to sit by the goat that I milk and squirt milk in her mouth as I am milking the goat.

Summer Is Finally Here....

It has been a while sine I posted here I did write a bunch of posts they are in the draft some with titles and some without, I just had so much gardening and fun farm work to do while we had the perfect weather here in our area.
Our garden is doing really good, we have so much growing out there I can not keep up, the herbs are so abundant I have to give away all kinds like mint, basil, dill, cilantro, Oregano, garlic, parsley and the kale, beet green,chard, celery, 3 different kinds of lettuce, peppers, tomatoes least 4 different kinds, then I have so many different kinds of sunflowers and they are so big and towering over the rest of the vegetables to provide shade from our hot sun, It is always amazing to me after a few days of putting the seed in the ground and water it how God brings forth life and makes it grow and bring forth beauty, nourishment, and many many more seeds. On the other hand we now have 9 goats, 3 mama milking goats so we have an abundance of goats milk from 3 different breeds of goats, Lamancha, Nubian, Nigerian dwarf and Alpine, Our chickens are doing great and 3 of them are sitting on many many eggs so we are going to have many baby chicks running around soon.
Our above ground pool is been up and running, thanks to my wonderful husband he does all the work on it. I did get my own horse a few weeks ago his name is virgil kane so now we have 3 horses Iris have a new horse his name is deekay, Pumpkin is Nellie's horse now oh and we do have a new addition to our little farm, his name is Wally the goose.

Jesus Made My Valentine One Of The Best

David called me around noon and said they just had a meeting and the manager told him and a couple of other employee that they can work from home and that they do not have to come to the facility unless they really want to.
After we hanged up I paused for a little while and remembered all the times I used to pray asking God to give David work at home, but after asking for so long I kinda gave up thinking may be that was too much to ask and I should just be thankful he has a job, so I stopped asking God that, in fact I almost forgot about that prayer request.
It took me a few minutes to realize that GOD did answered my prayer, I jumped up and called Iris and shared with her how God answered a prayer that I had forgot about and ON VALENTINES DAY, we both rejoiced and started planning a bunch of little vacations that we can take now that David can work remotely and basically from any where we are, joy filed my heart and I just started singing and praising my LORD for his faithfulness, even when we forget about things we prayed for.... HE remembers and answers our prayers in HIS perfect timing..........
My Jesus I love thee............I know thou art mine
Thank you for making my Valentines day a wonderful one.

Before You Meet Prince Charming

I have been praying very hard for the past few months that God would give me wisdom and understanding in the way I should be helping Iris become the godly young woman that God wants her to be, so I found this book and the title "Before You Meet Prince Charming" LOOKED VERY INTERESTING, I ordered the book and we started reading it together, (love doing that with her), I found it to be exactly what I was seeking to teach her printed in the pages of this wonderful book in a very realistic, interesting, and funny way and the best thing in this book is that it mentions HORSES, so for Iris it became interesting!

There is so much in this book, it is loaded with great stories, insights and verses that are just right for her age and the season of life she is in.

Today we read about the topic of dating, the book listed 6 dangers of dating, oh that was good!!
besides it has so much about courtship too(God's way to find your future spouse)

I believe every young woman need and should read this book over and over so she can learn God's way is better than the world way and that God is able to bring couples together in marriages.

So do I believe in arranged marriages?

YES I DO, God is able to arrange marriages for the individuals that obey HIS WORD and wait patiently on HIM.

What is God's primary purpose for marriage?

What is God's primary purpose for marriage?



Understanding God's purpose for marriage is of the utmost importance, because to marry and miss it is to enter into a life full of frustration and disappointment -- setting the stage for great marital unrest. Most of us tend to marry with very romanticized ideas of what marriage is going to be. With great excitement we anticipate the relationship that will finally meet our romantic and emotional needs. God's primary intention for marriage however, is not what most of us imagine it to be. He has not designed marriage as a place where we can finally try to get our needs met. He has created it as something much better -- something far more grand than that. God intends to use marriage to accomplish a very important goal -- one that is His primary goal for all Christians. God's primary purpose for marriage is to use it to help shape us into the image of His Son. If we miss out on this we are doomed to a life of anxiety and frustration.

Yes, marriage is God's arrangement for lifetime companionship and the arena for our sexual expression, but like with all that He has created, God uses marriage to direct us towards Himself. The challenges offered in marriage He capitalizes on to help shape and mold us into the image of Jesus. To evaluate our personal success in a marriage we must not then look to see if our needs are being met, but we must ask ourselves, "Am I demonstrating the image and character of Jesus Christ?." We determine our success by how much we are becoming like Christ -- loving and honoring our spouse according to the specific roles God has laid out for us in the Scriptures. Far wiser than us, God knows that as we grow into the image of Jesus our greatest needs are met.

Sadly, most of us have been under that false notion that God means for our mate to meet all of our romantic and emotional needs. We marry, fully intending to have our spouse be all that we ever wanted in a mate. Shortly after the wedding though, we begin to think that our new partner has a lot of changing to do. In fact, it appears they are far from being able to fully meet our needs. Instead of being fully committed to our idea of what a marriage is all about, they entered in with their own ideas of what marriage is to be -- along with their own list of needs they expect us to meet.




The most successful marriages

A study of marriage in history reveals that long-lasting marriages are generally those which are more "role" oriented than "romance" oriented. That is, those Christian couples who marry with a clear understanding of their biblical roles, and have as their primary purpose to carry them out, are generally happier in marriage than those who marry in order to get their needs met. Considering that 20th century America places such emphasis on building marriages on the right romantic "chemistry," it should be no surprise that many are easily disappointed in their marriages. What we have come to believe to be right romantic "chemistry" is actually nothing more than "self-centered" love. Most people are romantically drawn to those who gratify them, so marry with expectations of being fulfilled by their mate. That type of love is not true selfless love, but is self-centered, basing its attraction on personal gratification. It says, "I love you for what you do for me. I am drawn to you for how you make me feel. I know I am in love with you, because I need you so much." Needing someone is not evidence of a selfless, giving love for them -- contrarily, it is evidence that you want them for the emotional fulfillment you will receive from them. It is a reasonable estimate to suggest that 98% of all Christian marriages today are based on this dangerous form of self-serving love. Is it a surprise that so many are unhappy in marriage?

Men and women are different in their unique expressions of self-centered love for each other. A woman frequently marries looking for fulfillment in her relationship with her husband. Her husband, on the other hand, marries looking for fulfillment outside the marriage in his job or in a hobby. In a normal marriage we find a wife trying to get her needs met in her husband and a husband wanting his wife to be with him while he gets his needs met outside the home. Wives tend to want relationship. Husbands tend to want companionship. God, knowing this, puts these two together with the intent that overcoming their differences will help make them more like His Son. He wants neither one to try to get their "needs" met in the other. He put them in the relationship to learn to be givers not takers. God knows that that is our greatest inner need.

One problem in understanding the truth of this is that the wife's needs do sound more noble than her husband's, since she puts so much emphasis on the relationship. Yet God has not called us to commit to a relationship (or even to get anything out of a relationship). He has called us to commit to a person. There is a big difference between a loving a person and loving a relationship. A genuine loving commitment to a person requires selflessness -- your goal being to give and get nothing back (1 Cor 13:5). Loving a relationship, on the other hand, feeds selfishness, because it is committing yourself to something you will benefit from. It is an investment in yourself. Impatience, anger, and frustration will flourish in a relationship where the relationship itself is valued more than the other person it involves. Giving to get is never consistently satisfying.

If we are ever to find joy in our marriage we must never lose sight of God's goal for us -- complete selflessness. For only in that kind of submission to God is there joy. Only when we are truly submitting to God and honoring our mate the way He has commanded will we find fulfillment. As the designer of the marriage relationship He knows that our obedience will fulfill far deeper needs in us than any we thought we had. For with that obedience not only do we have the peace that comes from knowing we are right with God, but our spouse thrives on the character of Jesus reflected in our actions and they become a better partner -- making the marriage a more pleasant place to be.

We can learn something about this from the account of Adam and Eve. They were two individuals who thought they knew what their needs were and what it would take to make them happy. Their desires though, when achieved, brought little more than a sweet taste in their mouths. They settled for less, and in doing so, alienated themselves from God and brought a great deal of pain to following generations. What a price to pay for such fleeting happiness! Had they abided by God's perfect plans they would have been able to enjoy real fulfillment.

Like Adam and Eve many of us think that it is possible to achieve happiness by doing that which is appealing to the flesh. We are tempted to believe that if only we can get our spouse to pay the right kind of attention to us or to stop "hassling" us we will be happy. Because that is not God's way though, we can be sure that no matter what we obtain we will never be satisfied. It will be a never-ending, highly stressful search.




Marital difficulties make us more like Jesus.

Those who welcome the difficulties of marriage, become more like Jesus. Those who bail out of marriage, or quietly wish theirs would end, miss the spiritual benefits of enduring trials. Learning to endure trials makes one more holy. Jesus himself was made perfect (mature or complete) through his suffering. Consider:

In bringing many sons to glory, it was fitting that God, for whom and through whom everything exists, should make the author of their salvation perfect through suffering. Hebrews 2:10



Although he was a son, he learned obedience from what he suffered Hebrews 5:8


Through trials believers are shaped into the image of Christ.

Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. Romans 5:3-5



This third I will bring into the fire; I will refine them like silver and test them like gold. They will call on my name and I will answer them; I will say, 'They are my people,' and they will say, 'The LORD is our God.'" Zech 13:9



In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith--of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire -- may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 1 Peter 1:6-7



Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4



Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. 1 Pet 4:1



" Endure hardship as discipline; . . . God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness, . . . it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Hebrews 12:7,10,11

God's primary goal for His people is for them to be conformed into the image of Christ. He therefore uses difficulties and challenges to refine our character and strengthen our faith. Without discipline and challenge an athlete never grows stronger or more skilled. Without testing through suffering, a Christian will never grow strong in Christ. Growth, both natural and spiritual, comes only through challenge.

Following Christ means the laying aside of our plans and goals and the adoption of God's. Therefore, if we share God's goal, and wish to become like Christ, then we will can rejoice when we encounter the opportunities for growth afforded by suffering. Having a joyful response however, requires that we actually do share Christ's goals for our life. If we are pursuing a trouble-free, happy marriage we will avoid and resist opportunities for suffering, but if we share God's values and crave godliness, we will genuinely find joy in our difficulties.

Many want to avoid the challenge of marriage, because they mistakenly believe that God’s ultimate goal for them is "happiness." They perhaps, made a decision to follow Christ originally because someone told them that if they added Christ to their life he would make things “go better.” They came to Christ for “happiness.” They married to be "happy." They were defrauded. God desires for his people joy, not happiness.

Joy comes from trust in God's love and sovereignty -- it is an inner peace not connected to circumstance (Phil 4:4-9). Happiness is nothing more than feelings of well-being based on happenstance -- it is conditioned completely on what happens or how things go. Like Christ, who was called the "Man of Sorrows" (Isaiah 53:3), those Christians in God's will, find themselves in many unpleasant and unhappy hardships, even in a challenging or difficult marriage. They will however, have great joy if they trust God is in control of the trial, that He is using it to strengthen their faith, and that He will not give them more than they can handle.

Those Christians who forsake their wedding vows and abandon their mates, often justify their action by declaring that God wants them to be happy, and separation is the only thing which will bring them happiness. The error of this type of thinking should be obvious. God wants for us not happiness, but the joy which results from godliness. We grow in godliness by selflessly loving others in the midst of adversity. Leaving an unhappy marriage only shows we didn't allow the trial to drive us to Christ.

Thinking we understand God's plan, some of us also sell ourselves short. We may grasp the need to stick with our marriage, so we do just that. We hang in there. We may even feel we are doing well to handle our mate's disagreeableness, but the truth is that God has not called us to simply "hang in there" or tolerate our husband or wife. The command is not, "Husbands tolerate your wife as Christ tolerates the Church." God's goal is not for us to put up with our mate, but for us to be uncompromisingly devoted to them, seeking to get back nothing in return. There is a world of difference between toleration and commitment -- the one is self-protective and the other is self-sacrificing. One makes us a self-concerned, cautious observer and the other a devoted participant.




What about those for whom it does not work?

There are those who believe that they have tried it God's way and yet feel it did not work. That would, of course, be impossible. If something God designed hasn't worked for us, the problem lies in our approach not with God's design. God is perfect and nothing He does or creates is flawed. In fact, his plans for marriage are not simply OK -- they are wonderful and incredibly brilliant! As we whole-heartedly submit ourselves to God and comply with His master-plan we can be sure our lives will be blessed. If we rest in His perfection and wisdom we can know that obedience to Him will bear good fruit. If we have not found fulfillment in "trying" it God's way, we need to realize that we weren't doing it right. It could very well be that we were hindered in succeeding, because we were doing something to give the devil a foothold in our life. We most probably have been the source of our own failure.

The fact is, we must obey God not because we want to make our spouse change, or because the trial will go away, but because God has spoken. The very fact we make the statement, "I tried that and it didn't work," indicates that we didn't obey God with a pure heart -- our motives were self-serving -- we were obeying in order to get a result. As followers of Jesus, we don't give obedience to God a "try," or follow biblical principles so that we will be blessed -- we obey Christ because He is the Lord.



May all who read these words be willing to trust God and do what is right. Amen!




Addendum

Lest the reader think that God has no interest in romance, it is important to remember that God was the original inventor of romantic love, and in fact, devoted the entire book of Song of Solomon to the subject. (Many even construe that book to be a metaphor of Christ's love for the Church.) Let none be confused -- God does desire his people to enjoy romance in marriage. However, those who enter into marriage with the intention of finding perfect romantic fulfillment, have entered it with self-centered motives and will therefore find great disappointment. The best romantic love is fostered in a marriage in which both partners have served one another selflessly. Their love has grown, because they have been won by the other's devotion. May we all foster great romantic love in our marriages by our selfless service to our mates.





For the source please click HERE.

I just recieved this in an e-mail and I am trying to spread it every way I can so I posted it here too, it makes so much sence to me. hope you spread it too.

One Light Bulb at a Time
A physics teacher in high school, once told the students that while one grasshopper on the railroad tracks wouldn't slow a train very much, a billion of them would. With that thought in mind, read the following, obviously written by a good American...

Good idea.... one light bulb at a time...

Check this out. I can verify this because I was in Lowes the other day for some reason and just for the heck of it I was looking at the hose attachments... They were all made in China . The next day I was in Ace Hardware and just for the heck of it I checked the hose attachments there.. They were made in USA . Start looking...

In our current economic situation, every little thing we buy or do affects someone else - even their job ... So, after reading this email, I think this lady is on the right track. Let's get behind her!

My grandson likes Hershey's candy. I noticed, though, that it is marked made in Mexico now. I do not buy it any more.

My favorite toothpaste Colgate is made in Mexico .... now I have switched to Crest. You have to read the labels on everything...

This past weekend I was at Kroger... I needed 60 W light bulbs and Bounce dryer sheets. I was in the light bulb aisle, and right next to the GE brand I normally buy was an off-brand labeled, "Everyday Value." I picked up both types of bulbs and compared the stats - they were the same except for the price...
The GE bulbs were more money than the Everyday Value brand but the thing that surprised me the most was the fact that GE was made in MEXICO and the Everyday Value brand was made in - get ready for this - the USA in a company in Cleveland , Ohio .

So throw out the myth that you cannot find products you use every day that are made right here...

So on to another aisle - Bounce Dryer Sheets.... yep, you guessed it, Bounce cost more money and is made in Canada ... The Everyday Value brand was less money and MADE IN THE USA! I did laundry yesterday and the dryer sheets performed just like the Bounce Free I have been using for years and at almost half the price!

My challenge to you is to start reading the labels when you shop for everyday things and see what you can find that is made in the USA - the job you save may be your own or your neighbors!

If you accept the challenge, pass this on to others in your address book so we can all start buying American, one light bulb at a time! Stop buying from overseas companies!

(We should have awakened a decade ago...)

Let's get with the program and help our fellow Americans keep their jobs and create more jobs here in the USA.

I passed this on... will you???????